Hair.

I've decided to chop off my hair... Tori Spelling style. My hair is so damaged and icky. I need a fresh start.

OMGosh!

DO NOT HAVE KIDS IF YOU CANNOT AFFORD THEM!

BABIES ARE EXPENSIVE & THE OLDER THEY GET THE MORE MONEY YOU NEED. DUH!


YOU SHOULD NOT RELY ON OTHER PEOPLE TO BUY YOU GIFTS!

WE HAD TO BUY EVERYTHING FOR OUR CHILD. THAT'S THE WAY IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE. SHEESH.

End of my rant.

Bowling.

I'm beginning to dislike bowling. I know that sounds mean but Jamie bowls ALL the time. Haha. He bowls in two leagues through the week. Just today, he quit Wednesday night and started bowling on a Thursday night league. Which means, he bowled last night (until 10 because he was bowling with OLD people) and then tonight with some friends. I don't know. I think the reason why it is starting to bug me is well, I don't have a hobby. I stay at home with Presley and take care of the house. Which is so not my hobby. It's my job. Don't get me wrong. I love staying at home with Presley. She's my everything but I need to find something else to do also. I was thinking of jewelry making. I could possibly sell them on Etsy. I want to do something creative and I love jewelry. I do so much here at the house and I still feel like a lazy bum. Even if I take an hour nap with Presley, I wake up feeling like couch potato. Blah.

I also think it would be neat to do something baby related. I love sewing but I have not patience. I mean, I'm a mommy so my patience level has risen. I was going to make Presley some cute bibs but she doesn't really care for bibs. Maybe I could just make something for babies. Aaah. I don't know. Oh well.

Anyway- Jamie and I have almost been here in Guam for a year! Wow! It will be a year for Jamie on the 3 or 4th of August. For me, it will be like the 10th. It makes me really sad though. For one, I still don't have Yoda-lee. I haven't seen her or hugged her in almost a year! I love my Boston Baby more than anything and mom won't make from her job and boyfriend to take her to vet! It isn't that hard and she complains about not knowing what to do with her when she goes out of town. Um, duh. Send her to me! Sheesh.
That dog is my life and I want Presley to grow UP with Yoda-lee. I also want Yoda-lee to be around Presley when she's little and won't pull on her or at her. Boston Terriers are so good with kids but she's going to be pissed when she gets out. She hates me. I just know it. I need to stop talking about it. It's making me cry.

Meh. I'm hungry.

I need a hair cut...

badly. I haven't had my hair cut in years. I think I just might go and get it trimmed. I have so many split ends. I really think about 3-4 inches off would be good enough. I also want to get my hair dyed. Nothing special... just all one color and dark. My hair is naturally dark brown but with the dead hair (that I've dyed through out the years and then never cut) it's a weird light reddish/brown at the ends. I think after the trim if everything still isn't one color that I might get it dyed a chocolate brown. Every single time I see women with gorgeous dark hair, I want to dye mine again. Haha.

Katy Perry is the perfect example. Her hair is so beautiful. Bah. Oh well. We'll see what happens within the next few days.

I have a "candle" party this weekend. I'm trying to be more outgoing. Having this party is a big step for me. I usually don't like people in general. I don't ever feel that comfortable around people that I don't really know. *sigh* I just don't want Presley to be a super shy kid like I was. Heck, I am just NOW starting to open up more. That's sad. The only real reason behind the candle party is that I want more wax and I forgot which scents I love. Haha. Plus, a friend of mine loves candles and she doesn't have any Scentsy. I figured that we might be able to scrap together enough people to have a party. Haha. I don't know a couple of the people that I invited. They are new to the island and I figured it would be nice for them to have something to do. Plus, Scentsy rocks.


Meh. I decided yesterday that I didn't want to get another small SUV. The darn FJ is considered an off road vehicle and I want a family car. I want to know that my little honey bee is safe. So, I did some research. I now want a 2008 MAZDA5. They are awesome. They are a car/minivan combined into one! Haha. Th back door slides open making it easier to load and upload your little one. Tehe. Jamie told me that once his Dodge is sold, I can sell my Honda and then we can get a new car. That's fine with me. We'll probably be stateside by then and I won't have to worry about wrecking my new car or killing it on the awful roads in Guam.





Anyway, I'm off to make a grocery list. Today is payday. Hoooray! Haha.

HAZZAH!!

OUR PHONE IS WORKING!!!


Time to harass my brother.

Oy!

There's nothing greater than realizing you have baby poo under your thumbnail...

Today was fantabulous to say the least. Okay, so it's only 20 til 1 and the day still hasn't officially started. Haha. I've been all morning with Presley, which is fine with me. Jamie & I went to bed quite early last night. I made cheesecake at 10 last night and decided to hop into bed with Jamie around 10:30. Completely ignoring the luxurious cheesecake in the fridge. *sigh* I was exhausted and honestly, I wanted some bowchicawowow.


Sex hasn't really been the same since Presley. Jamie & I couldn't wait until we were able to "hit the sheets" like before. But darned if a 9 pound baby doesn't make things um, ache. That darned pubic bone needs to get her stuff together... I'm sick of flinching. I actually enjoy sex with my hubbles. Darn childbirth. I thought it was soo easy and everything would be "fine" after 6 (extremely long) weeks. Pssah.

Anyway, Guam sucks. Did I mention that? Due to the hellacious thunderstorm (previously mentioned in the blog before) our phone is still not turned back on. They were supposed to fix it last night and then it changed to "first thing this morning". Ahahahaha. It's 1pm and I haven't seen GTA at all in this darned neighborhood. I told Jamie to walk to Joey & Christina's to use their phone but he passed out on the couch with Presley. I am too lazy and it's only 125 THOUSAND degrees outside. Hot weather sucks. Tell me why I agreed to move to Guam? Oh yeah, more mulah.

Oh well. After this we're going to *crosses fingers* Connecticut! Yes, Jamie would be on a fast attack but I think Connecticut is worth it. Plus, we'll be on shore duty for 3 years when we first get there. I (freaking) love Savannah (Duh. It's Presley's middle name) Georgia and Jamie said that New London is a lot like Savannah. So, I'll probably love it. Plus, I want snow. I neeeeeed snow. I crave it's wintery beauty.


Since being a mommy I've learned:

Nothing makes you laugh harder than your baby firing poo missiles at your husband.

Time sure has flown by...

As of today, Presley is 2 months & 4 days old! I cannot believe how old is she! Man, everything has changed in our house. The few few weeks were pretty hard for me. I honestly believe that I had postpartum depression but I was in denial. I don't "believe" in depression as an illness. I believe it's a state of mind. So, I at the time, I refused to believe that I was depressed. I didn't tell anyone how I was feeling although, Jamie knew. He constantly asked how I was doing and if I was sad and needed someone to talk to. I didn't want to do anything. I sat in the living room and pumped out. Sadly, I didn't breastfeed. I tried. I tried so hard and wanted it so badly. I knew that it was the best thing for my daughter that is why I pumped out. I'm not even doing that now. I don't want anyone in my family to know because I have made such a big deal about breastfeeding. I feel like an awful mother. I know they will criticize me for doing so. It's very hard for me to do anything here though. I don't have the luxury of family OR friends. I have nobody here. Jamie has been working late days every since he started back at work. It sucks. I get no break in the day to do anything and sometimes the house is a mess... a biiiig mess. And here is Guam that isn't a good thing. Here in Guam there is an ant problem. No matter what, you will have ants in your home at some point in time. I hate those freaking ants. We had them spray and everything. They continue to come back. So, if you don't keep your house LITERALLY spotless, you have more ants than normal.

But I digress, life with baby is hard. Sometimes it feels like I'm a single parent. Jamie has duty every eight days... no matter what. So, every eight days I'm left alone to fend for myself. Needless to say, the house is a wreck whenever he comes home. My laundry is awful.. even now. I love being a mommy though. It's so rewarding. I love that little butter ball more than anything. I am a tough mommy and because I'm out here all alone, I will be a better mommy. The day Jamie went back to work was a duty day. (His chief and our besties didn't realize it was a duty day. Oh well. We still love 'em) It was hard but I'm thankful I had to go through that by myself. I became a stronger wife & mother that day.

It's almost 4am. Oddly enough, I'm not tired at all. Jamie & I went to bed around 10:30 and Presley woke up for a diaper change and food around 2:30. She has decided that she isn't tired either. So, she's playing in her bouncer. Jamie's chief bought it for us when Presley was born. She hasn't really enjoyed it until now. She loved the vibrations it makes but the toys never amused her. She will stay in that thing for hours kicking and talking. She loves it. She usually wears herself out in that thing so in a few minutes I'm going to put her back to bed. Hopefully she'll sleep until Jamie gets up for PT. I brought her in the living room so she wouldn't keep him up. I've been quite cranky lately... I think it's pms. Jamie calls me evil. Haha.

Oh well. Our house phone hasn't been working for three days now! Gah. I can't stand being without a phone. We had an awful storm the other night and apparently it killed our phone. What really sucks is that our phone company didn't know our phone was dead! Apparently, we are the ONLY ones in housing with GTA. Everyone else has MCV. Lame. On top of that, we don't even have a cell phone so we weren't able to call them until Jamie went to work the day AFTER the phone cut off. I didn't try to use to the phone for an entire day because I was so busy with Presley. I just thought it was one of those days were nobody calls. Haha. It SHOULD be working sometime tomorrow. So so lame.

Anyway, it's 4 and I don't hear Presley playing anymore. I think she might be asleep.